Something you did not know

It has been a long time that I stopped reading and writing. The ability is dusted in the back of my head but never disappeared.

Since you might read, I just want to take the opportunity to say Thank you for reminding me of who I was and why I am here.We all have stories to tell: the pains of growth and the joy of the same growth.

I started to love the younger age of myself when I actually know what I want. Simply an icecream or a visit to the zoo. Now I am lost all the time. I thought I want a designer clothes. But I did not realise whether it is the real 'I' wants it or it is the world tells me that I want it.

I always desire to make sure I know the reason of existing. And the best way is to keep thinking. Sadly lots of things have diluted the ability of consciously thinking. With a little knowledge in the media, I would attribute it to the advertisements, TV programs. Believe it or not, the media controls the world- sounds quite familiar! The matrix or the machine that we created controls us! One starts to desire things he does not need; then he has to work in the fields he finds it difficult to build the affection. But the world tells him he has to sacrifice. Then the unpleased mood must be compensated by the stronger desire at the beginning. He wants a larger house, a more beautiful wife, a posh yacht. But those are all illusions. It is the media who tells this lies and one believes the lies. If one asks him to score the happiness, no statistics could prove that he would be happier.

I am not superior to anyone. I just want to steer away something that I don't like and I know I, probably, could not resist. The more I desire, the more unhappiness hits me. I know for sure the extra pressure is well hidden beneath the glamour.

I chose to turn away and back to the world that I could handle. A world in which I need nothing more than books, friends and food