I don't mean to be like that...

I hope someone could take my appology of being so slow to understand what I was taught.

And PLEASE LET ME PASS!

Heritage

I did once wish that I were born elsewhere such as Austrilia, the US or the UK. Then I don't need to learn another language.

Or I were born with a sliver spoon. Then I would not only feel free to enjoy the luxury accommodation and buy plenty of beautiful clothes without the glance of the price but also I could study whatever I like without considering how to make a living.

Or I just enjoy any possible privillage on the earth.

Until I realise somehow heritage could be a bad thing.

It will take away my juicy feeling of life.

I had experienced the working class's life when I struggled to work as a waitress in a Chinese restaurant here, being requested a lot of ridiculous orders and critised by the particular Chinese boss.

And I had to give up my favourate subject literature since I can not guarantee that I could find a professional job with a handsome salary. I steered away from my beloved books but did a horrible volume of maths exercise and exams. If someone asks me to name the most terrible unhumanity thing, then I would say to demand a teenager to improve useless exam skills with a huge burden and sleepless nights for years just to enter a 'key' university.

I would not have gain the richness of life, pain and joy. I think only with pain that a man could grow into a man. Every lesson with pains will be writte deeply into my genes and be learnt by my heart forever.

Now I am happy of who I am. Experience all those in my past years, I found it easy to tackle the difficulties that I come across all the time. I did struggle when I had to learn an accounting qualification in a foreign language. Even for a native speaker, it could be challenging. Even for a student without a relative degree it could be challenging. Not to mention myself.

But I was born for some reasons, I believe. If it were taught in my mother language, if it were all about journalistic or communication stuff, if... many ifs. But life is full of everything but not ifs. Never if. Somehow people could not be successful in every field. Thank Lord gives me some talents so I could come this far.

I suddenly realise there is some heritages that I have not fully used.

The courage to conquer the obstacles.
The persistance to realise my dream
And the faith of my Lord.

If I have to choose any heritage, I would not go for many millions pounds but a gift of talent, to face every challenge in the richness of life.

A Bad Day...

I am very slow, at the moment, in learning both for my ACA course and my AS2 training even though I stay up late to recap a lot. My collegues seem quite cheerful everyday and not as struggling as I am suffering. For my study I keep reviewing my subjects everyday, step by step. I have planed to review Tax and Assurance in the evening while I work in the daytime, which I am doing now. And I will start reviewing accounting when I have my holiday- full seven days before the exam. I completely understand that things could be even worse if I have not been devoting 100% of my efforts.

I did or still have a bit doubt whether I am capable of doing this job. My difficulty does come from my English and non accounting experience. Many people may have one issue but I happen to have both. When I see my colleges started to use their skillful excel command to design professional work, I felt so bad since I did not know where to get the file!

Surely I don't want to be sacked for failing my exams but to certain extend that I have to admit I need more time to really understand something. Apart from that I have to accept the fact that people can't be good at every field...which makes me feel not good.

I began to talk less recently.